Dying Heart

Found a place that really meant for me where i can only reach out with click, a place where i can open up myself and people do understand me. Their open arms warm my heart. They’re so far yet so close to me with can’t be reachable physical distance. There’s one so close yet i […]

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A Night Without Companion

Tomorrow is my fur baby castration surgery. I sent him and left him there for 1 night. Oh my, my head so heavy. Surely he will meow loud out of scare. He never spend night at any without me other than his bed.  The moment i get home, clean up his scattered toys, smell his […]

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Nobody Can Save Me

I’m dancing with my demons I’m hanging off the edgeStorm clouds gather beneath meWaves break above my headHead-first hallucinationI wanna fall wide awake nowYou tell me it’s alrightTell me I’m forgiven, tonightBut nobody can save me nowI’m holding up a lightChasing out the darkness inside‘Cause nobody can save meStared into this illusionFor answers yet to […]

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Sunset Poet

Sunset makes the earth shine in gorgeous  Stars flickering their eyes at us How it’s easily make things fall in love with I sit under the starry night Watching sky turning denim and off  My mind is flying in the wonderland  Pouring beer drown myself with I just want get away from all this pain […]

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I Am Zombie

Part of me has died slowly till it’s too late to rebuild it. It’s impossible to get back what it used to be. That person long gone. I’m just a zombie walking around pretend to be human, hunting flesh and blood to survive as skin eater. No much left. Just a survival instinct. No goal. […]

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More Pain

I’m silent don’t mean I’m dead. Unless i silent for too long, i maybe become dry bones under the soil. Since 20th August, i back down, retreated. I lost hope of humanity. Human don’t deserve to exist. How i wish i have Force, crush this planet till dust..  I unable to open up or whatever […]

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Getting Better

I haven’t talked publicly that much about my own mental health. I think in interviews when Learning Not to Drowncame out, I may have touched briefly on being in therapy, but I’ve never gone into detail. I am very open with friends about it, but was always afraid of being judged publicly for having my […]

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Whisper From The Other World 

Wrestling in the war daily. When darkness crawling in, this is Herculean battle. It’s very wearing. I understand what they go through. It’s not easy. Sometimes, mostly monster drag us around, unplug ourselves is the only way to end the pain, but then, people finally realized too late for all of us.

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Go To Hell, Garbage 

“You’re so full of hatred!” “Because of your hateful heart, that’s how you deserve attacks!” I was born pure kindness heart, knew nothing, i thought the world would be wonderful if we do good to others. Help others when they needed without wish for reward. Pay them with kindness. None. This is not even exist! […]

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